Funny you mention Elixir. At one company, we passed around Ecto querysets. It started when the company was smaller. Then someone needed a little bit of analytics. And a few years of organic growth later and the system was bogged down. Queries where joining all over the place, and separating out the analytics from everything else was, again, a major undertaking.
I would love to see a counter example in real life at an org with over a dozen teams. A well working monolith and a well working monorepo are like unicorns; I don't believe they exist and everyone is talking about and trying to sell their mutant goat as one.
I am not selling you anything so you're starting off from a wrong premise.
What I said is that you should consider your experience prone to a bubble environment and as such it's very anecdotal. So is mine (a mix), granted. Which only means that neither extreme dominates out there. Likely a normal bell curve distribution.
What I did say (along with others) was that a little bit of technical discipline -- accentuating on "little" here -- nullifies the stated benefits of microservice architecture.
And it seems to me that the microservice architecture was chosen to overcome organizational problems, not technical ones.
I would love to see a counter example in real life at an org with over a dozen teams. A well working monolith and a well working monorepo are like unicorns; I don't believe they exist and everyone is talking about and trying to sell their mutant goat as one.